B) Honesty with the Self
Honesty with one's own self is of high importance in one's way toward self-identification and self-discovery. In order to get in touch with your real and true life purpose, you need to get in touch with your true and real self first. This is your gateway. But how can you open it to get to meet your real self and be in touch with it?
> Opening the gateway
Opening the gateway to receive yourself requires openness and honesty. They go hand in hand. You can not be open enough to rediscover and re-shape your perception of your own self without being really honest with yourself about who you actually are.
>> Obstacles on the way
1) Fear
One of the biggest obstacles on the way is fear. It can be fear of discovering something that we are not prepared for, or expecting. It can be fear of were discovery would take us - away from our traditional routines and "zones of comfort". Overcoming the feelings of fear is essential at this point.
I decided to use the word "overcome" because it is commonly associated with fear. But now I remember a statement by an Indian guru when he was asked about "overcoming fear", his answer was: You can not overcome something which does not actually exist. If you think abut it, you will discover that the things you actually fear do not really exist. What exists is your impression about them; the value you give to them. You create fears. In reality, they do not exist.
2) Resistance
Resistance is very close to fear. It can be one of its outcomes. In order to have a complete and full vision of who you really are, you need to learn to allow whatever you own self tells you. No matter what it is, understand that it is telling it to you for a reason. In other words, it has the right to feel the way it is feeling, and to tell you what it is actually telling you. So, instead of spending your energy resisting it, running away from it, and denying it, just learn to allow it. Let it exist and be. Listen to it, and understand it. Then, busy yourself finding the way out of your problems. (We will be discussing this later).
3) Predetermined & Preconceived ideas
Predetermined and preconceived ideas are the direct outcomes of fear and resistance. They are automatic beliefs you have about yourself. You adapt and perceive them as facts about you, and you start acting accordingly. For example, you have preset ideas about yourself that you are not good at public speaking or finance work. Each time you are called to a situation that involves public speaking or financial stuff, you just remember that you do not fit doing it. You feel trapped and unable to act. You avoid the situation altogether, and mark it as "banned". Instead of giving yourself the chance to try, learn, and acquire experience wit practice, you lose all the possible chances to know your true and real limits, and to stretch your abilities to the maximum that they can reach.
4) It must be done this way
Deciding that there is only one way to solve a problem is a limiting mental habit. It prevents you from finding other suitable, new, and even better ways to do something. It also disables your mind's creativeness and redirects it toward acting automatically according to a present, usually outdated, method of thinking. It is outdated with respect to your old self. You grow, and develop. You can not keep thinking the same way, and keep solving your problems the same way and expect a better life created a head. This is logically not possible. Besides, there is no single best way to do something. Every situation is unique, and thus requires creating a specific way to solve it. Develop this flexibility to try to see things from different perspectives. It may not be easy, but practice makes everything possible.
The way out?
Face your fears.
Stop resisting your feelings.
Listen to what your self has to tell you, and accept it.
Develop the ability to re-shape your thoughts and beliefs.
Step by step, you will be able to re-shape your entire life.
Facing your fears is the most effective way that can help you "overcome" them. Facing them means listening to them without rejection or judgement. All you really need to do is: just listen. Write them down if you prefer; maybe to keep record of them, or to see them as they really are: just ideas. They are ideas that can be changed. Once you identify them, deconstruction, replacement and reconstruction will be possible. They will be no more terrifying or fearful. Instead, you'll see that they will make the process of self discovery and self-development smoother, more meaningful - and I'd also add more enjoyable. They can be easily handled and reshaped.
Seeing things, situations, and ourselves in different and new light is worth the hard effort we have to take in order to develop. It is highly rewarding, and its outcomes are priceless.
Trust that you are being guided to your best. Even if you fail doing anything, stand up again, have confidence, have faith, continue to discover and learn about yourself; never abandon it. Enjoy the journey, and be thankful for this illuminating experience.
Wishing you a happy, enlightening and fruitful journey within yourself.
Honesty with one's own self is of high importance in one's way toward self-identification and self-discovery. In order to get in touch with your real and true life purpose, you need to get in touch with your true and real self first. This is your gateway. But how can you open it to get to meet your real self and be in touch with it?
> Opening the gateway
Opening the gateway to receive yourself requires openness and honesty. They go hand in hand. You can not be open enough to rediscover and re-shape your perception of your own self without being really honest with yourself about who you actually are.
>> Obstacles on the way
1) Fear
One of the biggest obstacles on the way is fear. It can be fear of discovering something that we are not prepared for, or expecting. It can be fear of were discovery would take us - away from our traditional routines and "zones of comfort". Overcoming the feelings of fear is essential at this point.
I decided to use the word "overcome" because it is commonly associated with fear. But now I remember a statement by an Indian guru when he was asked about "overcoming fear", his answer was: You can not overcome something which does not actually exist. If you think abut it, you will discover that the things you actually fear do not really exist. What exists is your impression about them; the value you give to them. You create fears. In reality, they do not exist.
2) Resistance
Resistance is very close to fear. It can be one of its outcomes. In order to have a complete and full vision of who you really are, you need to learn to allow whatever you own self tells you. No matter what it is, understand that it is telling it to you for a reason. In other words, it has the right to feel the way it is feeling, and to tell you what it is actually telling you. So, instead of spending your energy resisting it, running away from it, and denying it, just learn to allow it. Let it exist and be. Listen to it, and understand it. Then, busy yourself finding the way out of your problems. (We will be discussing this later).
3) Predetermined & Preconceived ideas
Predetermined and preconceived ideas are the direct outcomes of fear and resistance. They are automatic beliefs you have about yourself. You adapt and perceive them as facts about you, and you start acting accordingly. For example, you have preset ideas about yourself that you are not good at public speaking or finance work. Each time you are called to a situation that involves public speaking or financial stuff, you just remember that you do not fit doing it. You feel trapped and unable to act. You avoid the situation altogether, and mark it as "banned". Instead of giving yourself the chance to try, learn, and acquire experience wit practice, you lose all the possible chances to know your true and real limits, and to stretch your abilities to the maximum that they can reach.
4) It must be done this way
Deciding that there is only one way to solve a problem is a limiting mental habit. It prevents you from finding other suitable, new, and even better ways to do something. It also disables your mind's creativeness and redirects it toward acting automatically according to a present, usually outdated, method of thinking. It is outdated with respect to your old self. You grow, and develop. You can not keep thinking the same way, and keep solving your problems the same way and expect a better life created a head. This is logically not possible. Besides, there is no single best way to do something. Every situation is unique, and thus requires creating a specific way to solve it. Develop this flexibility to try to see things from different perspectives. It may not be easy, but practice makes everything possible.
The way out?
Face your fears.
Stop resisting your feelings.
Listen to what your self has to tell you, and accept it.
Develop the ability to re-shape your thoughts and beliefs.
Step by step, you will be able to re-shape your entire life.
Facing your fears is the most effective way that can help you "overcome" them. Facing them means listening to them without rejection or judgement. All you really need to do is: just listen. Write them down if you prefer; maybe to keep record of them, or to see them as they really are: just ideas. They are ideas that can be changed. Once you identify them, deconstruction, replacement and reconstruction will be possible. They will be no more terrifying or fearful. Instead, you'll see that they will make the process of self discovery and self-development smoother, more meaningful - and I'd also add more enjoyable. They can be easily handled and reshaped.
Seeing things, situations, and ourselves in different and new light is worth the hard effort we have to take in order to develop. It is highly rewarding, and its outcomes are priceless.
Trust that you are being guided to your best. Even if you fail doing anything, stand up again, have confidence, have faith, continue to discover and learn about yourself; never abandon it. Enjoy the journey, and be thankful for this illuminating experience.
Wishing you a happy, enlightening and fruitful journey within yourself.
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My deepest love and respect to you